Intense.

I woke up at 8am
I ran into the bathroom
Fell to my knees
And I retched.

Tears poured down my porcelain face,
Pain flared in my back and my sides
As I dry heave into the toilet
Nothing in my stomach

I sit back on the wall,
Trembling and crying
Wondering what the fuck
Was going on

My hand settles on my belly
Stroking, I noticed that
My hand is shaking
I swallow back the lump
Only to have it come back up again.

I flush the toilet and turn on the shower
I crawl into the tub,
Clothes and all.
I lay there.
Trembling and crying

After awhile,
I get out and look in the mirror
Dark circles are under my eyes
My hair clings to my face and neck,

I look like hell
I think to myself
I open the door and lay on my floor
Curling up into a ball.

I grasp my head
One hand, over my heart
It hurts so bad,
I wanted to scream

I clench my teeth
As another wave of pain hits me.
I'm as quiet as a mouse.
Never wanting to alert anybody else.

I pass out for what seems like hours
But in reality, it's been 30 minutes.
I crawl over to my laptop and see Kat messaged me.
I sit up and I type
"Hey" 

My fingers were trembling.
My arms hurt...
My cuts are burning me.
I smile because I know
Sooner or later,
Everything will be okay.