Saturday, January 1, 2011

Part 2

Everybody has problems... Why should I bother them with mine?
You expect me to always help you out...
You see what I want you to see...
But on the inside,
I'm aching...

I wanna be left alone
In my silent solitude
Pulling back from everything
I've ever loved.

Pulling back
From everybody I ever love.
Friends...
Family...

I'm always depressed
It seems like
The smile on my face
Isn't always there.

I put on a show
Maybe the smile is real
Maybe it's not
I feel like I should be sorry
For causing you all this pain.

Can't you see I'm hurting?
I'm not laughing...
No witty remarks

My meditation...
Is fucked...
I'm dying...
My friends are dying...
I'm powerless to stop it...

I'm sorry...
For not being a good friend...
My advice is shit...
Though...I'm not sorry
For the shit I did...
Posted by at

13 comments:

  1. Kat KnitsJanuary 1, 2011 at 8:36 PM

    Sam, you're worth it. Don't pull back from us, please... I dont' want to lose the only person I really trust with my life, damnit. Don't ever feel sorry for causing us pain. We can move past pain, and still love you for who you are.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Rio DonovoynJanuary 1, 2011 at 9:07 PM

    This life is full of challenges. This depression only makes it worse. This is a test...The fates all hate me, it seems. But who are we to decide what they choose?

    To overcome the depression, I guess I need to hit rock bottom... But who will pull me back up?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Kat KnitsJanuary 1, 2011 at 9:28 PM

    Me and the guys. You're Familia, like Eddie said. We will always be here for you, through the good times and the bad.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Rio DonovoynJanuary 1, 2011 at 9:38 PM

    I don't wanna be a bother...

    ReplyDelete
  5. Kat KnitsJanuary 1, 2011 at 9:42 PM

    You're never a bother, Sam. And yes, I'm telling you the truth.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Rio DonovoynJanuary 1, 2011 at 9:45 PM

    I dunno... If you say so...

    I live in in defening solitude...

    ReplyDelete
  7. Kat KnitsJanuary 1, 2011 at 9:54 PM

    You aren't a bother, Chica. Never are. And me and the gang are trying to break into that solitude, let you know you're not alone, and never will be.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Rio DonovoynJanuary 1, 2011 at 10:02 PM

    One must never know.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Kat KnitsJanuary 1, 2011 at 10:06 PM

    Never know what?

    ReplyDelete
  10. Rio DonovoynJanuary 1, 2011 at 10:08 PM

    When It'll hit...when it'll go away...
    The constant knowing of ifs and buts.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Kat KnitsJanuary 1, 2011 at 10:13 PM

    True. But I'm only a text away. I may not always answer right away, but I will.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Rio DonovoynJanuary 1, 2011 at 10:29 PM

    Yeah...I know...

    ReplyDelete
  13. Kat KnitsJanuary 1, 2011 at 10:36 PM

    A'ight.

    ReplyDelete

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